Take yesterday. A client who I've been seeing for about a year came to see me. An artist in her 20's, she was stuck in her journey. Big time. She had returned to New Orleans recently after traveling home to the Midwest for a few months to resolve some lingering family issues. And resolve them she did. Big time.
She cleared out a busload of issues that were as nasty, as smelly, and as big as Jabba the Hut. Issues that had demanded her attention, consumed her energy and blocked her path. Ever since her childhood. Now they were gone.
Freed from her past, my client expected new wonders to come in to her life. Upgraded relationships. Gigs that would allow her to get her own studio space. Most important, clarity of her artistic voice.
She got none of that. "I keep trying and trying. To make this happen, to make that happen. Nothing is happening," she explained.
“It feels like there’s a wall around you,” I observed.
“No, not a wall,” she corrected me. “I just feel empty. There’s nothing there anymore.”
“Yes, empty,” I agreed. Looking out beyond her, I listened to the Universe. I heard…and repeated to my client, “Something is blocking the natural Birth that should be following the Death of those family issues. It has nothing to do with what you’re doing outside. It’s inside. The block is inside. Of you.”
As I did so, my client literally wilted on my couch. Empty. I helped her up and half-carried her into the room where we do our sessions. She lay down and the fun began.
"You're going to die now," I whispered into her ear, channeling whatever spirit her Soul had called to help clear the block in the vessel it was currently occupying.
"Let go of everything. Even your breath. Slow your heart. Die to that emptiness."
Slowly, slowly, my client disappeared. When she was gone and her body still, I stripped off the layer of dead energy that had entombed her like a snake sheds its skin. I placed her hands on her chest and we did the heart meditation I wrote about last week. She started to come back.
No longer channeling, I told her, "Own this space that is your body. Live in it. Fully."
She sat up. Smiling and swaying.
“Stronger,” she said, “but a little crazy.”
“There are so many sounds. It’s the sounds I usually hear, but now there are so many of them.”
“Let them out,” I said. “Open the gates of your heart and let them out.”
Boy did she.
Sounds I have never before heard began cascading out of her. Primordial sounds. Vibrational sounds. That shook her body. Threw me back. Consumed the room. And they just kept coming.
Finally, my client carried one sound forward across the bridge from primordial times to the present moment. What began as an indescribable audial vibration ended as a glorious coo.
I’m not sure about her, but I know I had tears in my eyes.
With the Universe whispering the words to say in my ear, I told my client, “You’ve just found your Truth. Bring those sounds, those vibrations, forward through your art. Create that which will share their wisdom in today’s world.”
She opened her eyes, which indeed did have tears. “Really? That’s it? I’ve always heard those sounds. But I’ve never shared them. I’ve never done anything with them, except keep them to myself. I’ve been too afraid of what people would think.”
“Yes,” the Universe told me to say. “That’s where Truth can most often be found. Behind the sentry of our Fear.”
But, once found, even for a second, there’s no turning back. The birth has begun.